Today is one of those days when I find myself questioning....everything. Oh, how tiresome a trait is that, when one is already overloaded, but nonetheless, I went there. WHY am I doing this? To WHAT end? Is it REALLY important? And yes, I really do think about these things. Especially in the context of the very incredible people I meet each day. Do I -- and what I do -- really matter?
I am sitting here right now, feeling rather Carrie-ish in front of my Mac, pondering these little life lessons to be learned, and wondering just how impactful it is to be a keeper of things, an archiver of the obsolete, a fan of the obscure. It is, without a doubt, a highly sketchy occupation to have chosen, but when it all comes down to it, I will tell it to the mountains that it chose me, not the other way around. There is definitely the aspect of it having landed on me, rather than me landing on it. A little biblical in that sense, but very true.
I spoke with a friend and colleague in Boston recently, who asked me how I had ever had the foresight to buy and save toward this end... this culmination of creative I-don't-know-what that is burgeoning in our culture right now, and in particular, is manifesting itself as a movement of women realizing themselves and expressing same in ways that defy categorization. I can't answer that...no revelations there, only a drive to preserve what I felt was worthy. If it pans out, I guess I pulled the long straw. In the end, all that matters is that I chose what mattered to me. And how lovely that my selfish ends mattered to anyone else...
Bottom line, I have met -- in the short time I have really applied myself to this project -- the most amazing, surprising, entrepreneurial, sensitive, artistic, loving, sharing group of women that ever graced this earth. No shit. I am blessed once, twice, thrice. Take that for what it is, and what it will be. Stay tuned.